Have you ever done time2/16/2024 ![]() Similarly, when I a few years later, when I knew I wanted to get the hell out of Perth but didn’t yet want to admit it to myself, my behaviour said it all. Sometimes your gut simply just says “no.” And it’s ok to listen to that. There doesn’t always have to be a reason to leave a relationship. Eventually, surprise surprise, he broke up with me.Īnd while I still think he is one of the best humans on the planet, I wish I’d ended it sooner. While I was too scared to leave the familiarity of the relationship physically, I had started to check out emotionally. I resorted to behaviour I usually hated we bickered, I was catty, I was increasingly passive aggressive. I stopped showing up as my best self. Becoming lazier, I was more inclined to fight and less inclined to come up with solutions. You stop striving to be a better person.Īlthough my brain refused to acknowledge my boyfriend and I were not the right people for each other, my body knew, and my actions followed accordingly. Which brings me to clue 2, a clear indicator that it could possibly be time to leave: 2. This is not your person, it would say, which I would constantly ignore, distract myself, refuse to look it in the eye, like a dog refusing to look at the giant shit it just took on the carpet. But there was this voice, this undercurrent, that near the end got louder. When I wrote my first sexually explicit piece and posted it on the internet this year she was all “great job, my girl!” Like I said, dope.) It seemed ungrateful, almost, to want to throw it all away. He was ridiculously intelligent, handsome, kind and his parents were so dope I low-key wanted them to adopt me, too (actually, I still speak to his mom to this day. The problem was, I couldn’t justify to myself why. But it was around the two-and-a-half year mark that I started to get this niggling feeling that… maybe I did not want to be in this relationship anymore. I was eighteen when I had my first “grown up” relationship. 1.You feel like your gut is trying to tell you something, but you ignore it. So here are some definite markers I have learnt to trust that indicate when is a good time you’ve outgrown something, that it’s time to move on. What’s the right decision? What if I leave, and then change my mind? What if this is just a phase? I get it. Each time it is gut-wrenching, each time trying to decide wether to stay or go can be overwhelming. I’ve left people, jobs, plans, projects, friendships and cities. ![]() I think that’s a shit song from the 80’s, but the title does highlight a very important question we’ve all had to ask ourselves at least once in our life: is it time to leave? Does this job/ relationship/ city/ project/ friendship serve me anymore? Do I stay and work it out? Or do I go? Over the last few years I’ve done my fair share of leaving. ![]() that is dripping down your chin.” -Nayyirah Waheed, Nejma
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